OUR BREASTFEEDING JOURNEY

I want to start by saying that breastfeeding does not “just happen” from the get go.

Your baby isn’t born knowing what to do. It is something that you and your baby must learn, together. Have patience with your baba; have patience with yourself.

Also. Two babies are never the same. In alllll of the respects.

These are the best bits of advice I was given.

Sadly, my BF journey with Eli was exceptionally difficult. I had an NCT group of mothers; who all appeared to be naturally breastfeeding-gifted. I struggled with Eli’s latch. In hindsight, we wonder whether it was tongue-tie as he also had speech issues when he started talking. Anyway. I would grit my teeth and cross my fingers at every single feed. I’d fight back the tears when with company and let them free flow down my cheeks at home. The pain was unbelievable. I was cracked. Sore. Shattered. Shocked. Full of worry and felt immense pressure to ‘perform’.

I was also ridiculously scared to feed in front of friends, family and in public too. For fear of being told off, ridiculed, just a “look” caused me to panic and go straight home. I had many a break down whilst trying to do shopping when Eli would start to stir during that short window between feeds.

At 6 weeks we went to a wedding and I bought a @Medela Swing to express. I ended up expressing for a further 6-8 weeks until my supply dwindled. I just couldn’t get the feeds and expressing in. We then went onto SMA and Eli was a much happier baby for it. I was happier for it!

Edie however; a totally different baby. Edie took to the breast from her first feed and ran with it. I was possibly more relaxed this time. I had YouTube’ed everything in terms of latch, positioning and everything in between. I was armed with so many resources – just incase. I had nipple shields, I had Lansinoh, I had a new @medela, I put no pressure on myself and set no expectations. I was also a more confident mother but I still had the anxiety of feeding in front of friends, family and in public getting to me. This is something I learned with patience and understanding your baby. I also had a bank of clap-backs ready, just incase. I knew my legal rights as a mother too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

At our 6 month check I was still exclusively breastfeeding Edie and loving every single second. Yes there were days when she would cluster feed 24 hrs. But I just loved it. Absolutely loved it. Was I more attached to BF because of our miscarriage? Maybe? Was I more determined because I’d had such a shit time with Eli? Who knows. That midnight feed, curled up in bed together was actual bliss. It felt like it was just me and Edie awake on the whole planet ✨

But at that 6 month check, the HV suggested Edie wasn’t gaining enough weight. We were monitored and then referred to a paediatrician. I was advised to introduce Formula and solids as per the guidelines. I reluctantly went with it. Edie went with the changes, without fuss and ran; until the only breastfeed session left was that midnight feed. Which, by one point turned out to be more routine and comfort than sustenance any longer. We made it to 8 months or so.

I don’t remember our last breastfeeding session. It just stopped one night after a few nights of fussiness.

Which kind of breaks my heart.

But I cherish every single day that she fed attached to me. I really do.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have I googled and researched re-lactation? Of course I have.

But Edie? She’s happy. She’s thriving. She’s an SMA baby now too.

Breastfeeding mothers. I salute every single one of you. It hurts, it’s confusing, it’s damn tiring, no matter how little or long you decide to breastfeed for.

And if you feed your baby by bottle or breast, who even cares. Fed is best. That’s all that matters.

THEY ALL EAT CHIPS OFF THE FLOOR HOWEVER THEY MAKE THEIR START IN LIFE ANYWAY. SO 🤷‍♀️

 

Our changing bag: The Mulberry Clipper Holdall.

This has been the sight next to our front door, for the past NINE weeks. These are all our hospital bags, ready and waiting! Suitcase is mine, and is filled to the brim with every essential you need for your stay at hospital – you can read what those absolute essentials are, here>>I’ve FINALLY done it! Hospital Bag(s) are packed! The amazing Mulberry Clipper Holdall is our changing bag (more on that in a second), the Barbour bag to the bottom left is OH’s essentials (iPad, change of clothing, toiletries) and the Borough Market bag is all our food supplies!

So, Changing Bag… we spent such a long time searching for the “perfect” bag. We wanted something that didn’t look ‘Mummsy’. We didn’t want something that was feminine, OH will be carrying it around too! During our search we found that there was nothing that was completely unisex – apart from the generic black satchel style bags… which to be honest, just didn’t hit the spot for us! This is going to be a bag that we’ll use every day, so we wanted to be really happy with it! All of the ‘Mummsy’ style bags are pretty expensive anyway, £250+!

We looked for actual Leather satchels as we felt this would be most universal for us both. But with Leather, comes a pricetag. We soon found that even just nice Leather satchel bags, that weren’t necessarily for our purpose, were coming up at £400+. When we would look into the details of these bags, we found that there just wouldn’t be enough space for everything that a babba needs on a daily basis – as well as what we might need to cram in for ourselves too! We also decided we wanted something that would be kind of waterproof – Britain is not renowned for it’s dry weather is it!

We went to all the usual high street stores in search of just a standard, but small, holdall that would meet all our demands. We almost settled on this one from Barbour – Barbour Wax Cotton and Leather Trim Satchel, £119: Style available from JohnLewis.com

But, this bag is actually a little too big for what we need it for! It looked massive against me and I just couldn’t see ME using it. OH on the other hand, was chuffed with it.

So on with the search!

I’m a massive fan of Mulberry. It’s my favourite brand. So, I said I wanted a Mulberry Alexa…

Mulberry Oversized Alexa Messenger & Shoulder Bag, £925. Style available from JohnLewis.com

But then we realised that the £795 size wasn’t big enough… and £795 is a ridiculous price for a ‘changing’ bag! OH also concluded that an Alexa was too feminine for him. I did email Mulberry regarding changing bags, as they’re clearly missing a huge audience by not offering a selection! They replied to me with:

We have taken on board customer requests for changing bags and our soon to be available Autumn Winter 2012 collection will include the Rosie Baby bag in Black or Oak Tiger Print Nylon as part of the range.

Pretty exciting! But a bit too late…

Then I started looking at their holdalls. We’d always said we wanted a Clipper holdall. They’re classic Mulberry. They’re perfect for trips away. They’re a style that just will not date – but will get better with age.

We went along to Westfield: Stratford City to take a closer look. The Simple Mulberry Clipper Holdall (£350), was the perfect size! Inside and out 🙂

So we said “sod it” and bought it 😀 It’s beautiful. We’re over the moon with it – and more to the point, unlike ‘real’ changing bags, we’ll be using this holdall for years and years and years and years to come. It’s a style that is built to last! So we were happy to pay the £350 price-tag, because it’s going to get so much more use than a standard changing bag. It completely meets our very niche criteria and OH cannot wait to get outside with it 🙂

MM.

I’ve FINALLY done it! Hospital Bag(s) are packed!

After weeks and weeks of , “Oh, I’ll definitely pack it this weekend!“, I did actually get round to packing my hospital bag(s) this week! But only after I thought I was going into labour with my coccyx pain! Perhaps Baby Boy Bump was tired of my excuses for not packing the bags too!

So, with this all in mind. I thought I’d share my list of ESSENTIALS. I’ve been through absolutely dozens of “What to pack…” lists, along with forums and speaking with friends. And I think I’ve pretty much formed the definitive list. You DO need to take lots to the hospital. I’ve chosen to take everything in a suitcase simply because it’s easier than cramming everything into lots of bags… it will also fit in the boot of our car neater 🙂 I do know it looks like I’m going on holiday, but I swear, it’s all completely necessary!

Here we go then…

FOR ME.
To have ready to hand.
Birth plan/preferences
Maternity notes
Cash for carpark
Cash for payphone – there might not be signal. The battery might go on your phone!

For labour/ward.
Maternity pads – two packs of 10
Breast pads – 15 pairs
Cheap nightie(s)
Large cotton knickers – 7-10 pairs
Bedsocks with grips to the bottom – your feet get cold during labour.
Massage oil
Lipbalm
Bobbles
Headband
Hair grips
Brush
Pillows – my usual pillow and maternity pillow
x2 Dark towels
Phone chargers
Change of clothing for leaving the hospital – baggy, to fit at least a 4-5 month pregnant bump.
Slippers/Flip flops
Fan
Stopwatch – to time contractions
Swimwear – for the birthing pool!
Hot water bottle
Plastic jug – useful for afterwards, going to the loo is likely to be quite painful. Pouring a jug of warm water over the affected area whilst going to the loo can allegedly help sooth the pain.
List of phone numbers on paper
Face cloth
Camera
Toilet roll – we like our quilted Andrex!
Plastic bag for dirty clothes/towels
Book/Magazines
Pen and paper – useful for writing down notes that may be passed on from doctors/midwives; or in the instance that I can’t talk whilst mid-contraction! Also good to have if we get bored and fancy hangman!
Clean clothing for James (Other half)
Ear plugs – it might be quite noisy… 
Nice nightie for afterwards
Dark dressing gown
Birthing ball – just incase there isn’t one spare. This can be left in the boot if not needed.
Birthing ball pump

Toiletries
Shampoo
Conditioner
Makeup bag
Mirror
Deoderant
Toothpaste
Toothbrush
Mouthwash
Facewipes
Antibacterial hand gel
Gaviscon
Anusol
Deoderant
Dettol wipes for ward
Lavender Oil
James’ wash bag with toothbrush/deoderant/bryl creme

Something extra…
Chocolates for the Midwives for afterwards
Card for the Midwives for afterwards

Food/Snacks/Drinks
Raspberry Leaf Tea
Mini cheddars
Bananas
Cereal bars
Frozen drinks – it’s apparently quite hot on the wards. A frozen drink will melt slowly, so will be much nicer than warm bottled water!
Juice – cordial
Bottles of water
Glucose tablets
Bendy straws – useful for drinking at any angle!
Crisps
Two plastic cups – so we can celebrate afterwards?!
Peppermint teabags – useful for trapped wind and cramps afterwards.
Dried fruit
Chocolate
Soreen

BABY CHANGING BAG.
Going home outfit
x5 vests
x5 baby grow’s
Pair of scratch mittens
Hat
Booties
Blanket
x6 muslin squares
x6 bibs
Soft toy
Swaddle
Towel
Cardigan – just incase, I know it’s July, but I do live in England.

Toiletries
Cotton wool balls/Cotton wool pleats
Grooming kit – for his little nails!
x27 nappies – a whole pack of Pampers New Born.
Sudacrem
Vaseline – useful for smothering over Baby Boy’s bum, it makes it easier to clean the first newborn poo’s away.
Bottles – just incase there’s an issue with breast feeding.
Ready made formula bottles – just incase there’s an issue with breast feeding.

Is there anything I’m missing from your own list?! Something that might have proven absolutely essential for you during labour or afterwards?

MM.